Finding Myself in the In-Between: A Journey Through Motherhood, Identity, and Healing

Feeling Lost, Overwhelmed, and Stuck in Life

There are days when I feel like I’m living five different lives at once.

I am a mother responsible for shaping two little humans who look to me for everything. I am a daughter of immigrant parents who sacrificed so much, carrying expectations I don’t always know how to meet. I am a friend, an employee, a provider.

And somewhere in all of that… I am supposed to be me.
But who is that?

Lately, I’ve been sitting with that question more than I ever have before. Not because I want to lose any of these roles—they are all parts of me I deeply love—but because I’ve realized how easy it is to disappear inside them.

Anxiety, Guilt, and Emotional Overwhelm

Being a single mom comes with a quiet kind of weight. The kind that shows up when the house is finally still, but your mind is anything but. The racing thoughts, the constant worrying, the feeling that you’re always forgetting something or falling short somewhere.

And right behind that anxiety comes guilt.

Guilt for not being able to give your kids what you imagine a “proper” family looks like.
Guilt for working too much—or not enough.
Guilt for feeling overwhelmed.
Guilt for needing space.
Guilt for not showing up perfectly in every role you carry.

It’s exhausting—this cycle of anxiety and guilt feeding into each other.

How Therapy Helps You Slow Down and Reconnect

Therapy, for me, has become a space where I can finally put all of this down.

A space where I don’t have to be “everything” to everyone.
Where I can just be a person trying her best.

It’s where I’ve started to understand that the pressure I carry didn’t come from nowhere—it was shaped by love, survival, culture, and expectations passed down over time, by everything I’ve been holding for so long.

It’s also where I’ve learned that guilt doesn’t always tell the truth.

Learning to Take Life One Day at a Time

Just because I feel like I’m not doing enough doesn’t mean it’s true.
Just because I feel like I’m falling short doesn’t mean I am.

And most importantly—showing up is enough.
Even on the hard days.
Especially on the hard days.

I’m learning to take things one day at a time—not five steps ahead, not trying to do everything “right.” Just today. Just this moment. Just the next breath.

Burnout, Rest, and Finding Meaning Again

Because the truth is, the world tells us to keep going—to hustle, to push through, to stay busy—as if rest is something we have to earn.

But if we never stop, we miss everything.

The smiles. The laughter. The quiet moments.
The beauty that’s already here.

I’ve come to realize that rain is what makes the flowers grow. The hard days are not proof that I’m failing—they are part of the process.

Healing Is Not Linear

Healing isn’t linear. It never was.

Some days my anxiety is loud.
Some days the guilt creeps back in.
Some days I feel like I’m starting over.
And other days, I feel grounded and strong.

All of it counts.
All of it is part of growth.

Letting Go of Perfection and Comparison

It’s hard not to compare myself to others—to wonder how they seem to do it all so effortlessly. But I’m learning that comparison steals the truth: we are all carrying something different.

Perfection isn’t real.

Our struggles don’t make us less.
They make us human.

Rebuilding Self-Worth and Compassion

And even when my mind tries to convince me otherwise, I’m learning to gently challenge those thoughts—to soften them, to speak to myself the way I would speak to my children—with patience, understanding, and love.

To remind myself that I am worthy.
Not someday. Not when I “figure it all out.”
But right now.

Small Moments of Healing and Growth

Lately, healing has looked like small things.

Dancing again.
Reading more.
Stepping outside and letting the air hit my face.

Tiny moments that don’t seem like much—but they are.

You Don’t Have to Figure This Out Alone

They are reminders that I exist beyond my responsibilities. That I am allowed to feel joy. That I am allowed to pause—even when the world tells me to keep going.

Because if we never pause, we never truly live.

And life, even in all its chaos, is still beautiful.

I am still becoming.
And maybe that’s the point—

not to have it all figured out, but to keep showing up anyway.

One day at a time.
And today, that is enough.

If you’re feeling overwhelmed, anxious, burned out, or lost in life, therapy can help you reconnect with yourself and find clarity. At Unify Counseling Inc., we provide therapy in Evanston, Northfield, and the greater Chicago area for individuals navigating anxiety, burnout, and life transitions.